"My Bra Gives Me Rolls, So I've Stopped Wearing Anything Fitted." Nancy Answers.
Dear Nancy,
I'm 66 and I've stopped wearing half my clothes. My bra band cuts into my back and pushes up rolls under my arms and over the band, and everything in front sits lower than it used to. In anything fitted I look lumpy from every angle. So I live in big sweatshirts and cardigans, even in July.
My husband says I look fine. But I have a closet full of nice blouses, some with the tags still on, and I haven't worn my favourite one in three years. When I go without a bra at home I feel sloppy, and I won't answer the door like that.
Is this just what happens at my age? Should I give up and buy bigger clothes?
Hiding in Cardigans, Tucson
Dear Hiding,
Please don't buy bigger clothes. I was you three years ago, right down to the blouse with the tags on. And here's what nobody told either of us: the rolls aren't your body. They're your bra.
A bra holds you up with a tight elastic band round your ribs. It has to be tight, or it slides. After 60 our skin is softer and looser, so a tight band sinks in and the soft skin above and below it folds over. That's the roll you see in the mirror. Take the bra off and it's gone, isn't it?
The sag in front is the same band. As the day goes on it rides up your back, and when the back goes up, the front drops. So you get the worst of both: squeezed at the back and low at the front.
What fixed it for me was getting rid of the band altogether.
What I wear now
A woman in my water aerobics class put me onto a tank top with the bra built in. I'd written those off. The shelf-bra camis in the stores are a thin strip of elastic and a pad that folds up in the wash.
This one is made differently. The cups are shaped and sewn into the lining for good, so they hold you where a bra would. And because it's a fitted top that runs all the way down to your hips, the weight is spread over the whole garment instead of hanging off one tight band.
Now turn around in the mirror in one, and you'll see why I'm telling you this. The back is one smooth piece of fabric from your shoulders to your hips. No band, no hooks, nothing sinking in, so there's nothing for anything to fold over.
The front stays up, too. With no band there's nothing riding up your back, so nothing drags the front down, and the wide straps hold everything where you put it in the morning.
Three things I'd tell you, woman to woman
- Get the nude one first. It disappears under white and pale blouses, so you can start wearing your nice tops again straight away.
- Wear it on its own around the house. The square neckline and long hem make it look like a proper top, so you're dressed when the doorbell goes.
- Put that favourite blouse on over it and stand side-on in the mirror. Then write back and tell me.
It's called the Freeform Tank. It's sold by the company directly, not in stores, and they're doing Buy 3 Get 2 Free for our readers at the moment. Go and get that blouse out of the closet.
The Freeform Tank
- Cups sewn in, no band or wire
- Smooth back, no hooks
- Six colours, S to 3XL
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